8.183. Why don’t traditional Catholics hold hands during the Our Father or give the sign of peace? Isn’t that uncharitable or cold?
To many Catholics raised in the Novus Ordo, it may seem cold or unfriendly when traditional Catholics do not hold hands during the Our Father or exchange the sign of peace. Isn’t this a sign of unity? Isn’t it uncharitable to withhold such gestures?
In truth, these practices are novelties introduced after Vatican II and are foreign to the ancient liturgical tradition of the Catholic Church. Their omission in the traditional Latin Mass is not due to a lack of love—but due to a higher understanding of what the Mass actually is and how fraternal charity is rightly expressed in sacred worship.
1. The Mass Is Primarily Directed to God, Not Man
The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is not a gathering focused on mutual affection or horizontal communion. It is the unbloody re-presentation of Christ’s Sacrifice on Calvary, directed vertically to God. During this moment, our eyes and hearts are lifted to Heaven—not to each other.
Gestures like hand-holding or passing the peace shift the focus from God to the congregation, distorting the proper spirit of adoration and interior recollection that the liturgy demands.
2. Holding Hands: A Modern Invention Without Liturgical Basis
There is no record in Catholic liturgical history of the faithful holding hands during the Our Father. This practice became widespread only after the 1970s, as part of a general movement toward emotional expression and physical signs of “togetherness” promoted by post-conciliar liturgists.
But the Our Father is a prayer addressed to the Father by His Son, on behalf of us, in the context of a Sacrifice—not a communal cheer or shared moment of affection. The faithful should be recollected, focused on God, with hands joined in prayer—not physically connected in horizontal gestures foreign to Catholic tradition.
3. The Sign of Peace: From Liturgical Symbol to Social Disruption
The “kiss of peace” in the early Church was a stylized liturgical gesture exchanged only among clergy before Communion, as a sign of ecclesial peace and unity. In the traditional Latin Mass, it is rarely used—and never as a general handshake among the faithful.
The post-Vatican II “sign of peace” is not merely a liturgical distraction — it is part of a fabricated and illegitimate rite. The Novus Ordo Missae, including its “priests” and “Eucharist,” is not merely less reverent but is often invalid altogether due to serious defects in form, matter, intention, and invalid ordination rites introduced after 1968. The so-called “sign of peace” inserted before “communion” interrupts what should be the most sacred moment — but in reality, it precedes the reception of what is, in most cases, not the true Body and Blood of Christ. Instead of leading souls to adore Christ in the Blessed Sacrament, the modern ritual fosters horizontal emotionalism, replacing sacrifice with sentiment and turning the Mass into a man-centered celebration devoid of sacramental grace.
This contradiction has been acknowledged even by some modern “clergy”. The Congregation for Divine Worship (2008) noted that the “sign of peace” is often abused and disrupts the sacred moment of Holy Communion. From a traditional Catholic standpoint, its omission helps preserve reverence, recollection, and awe.
4. True Charity Is Not Sentimentality
Charity is the supernatural virtue of love of God and neighbor for God's sake. It is not measured by smiles, gestures, or emotional displays, but by fidelity to the truth, proper worship of God, and sincere concern for others’ salvation.
When traditional Catholics refrain from sentimental or disruptive gestures during Mass, it is not because they lack love—but because they desire to show God the reverence due to Him. The Mass is not the time for gestures of human affection. There is no greater charity than to assist at the Holy Sacrifice with faith, recollection, and reverence.
| Aspect | Traditional Latin Mass | Novus Ordo Practice | Remarks |
|---|---|---|---|
| Focus of the Mass | God-centered, vertical worship | People-centered, horizontal emphasis | Gestures like handholding distract from God |
| Our Father | Recited in prayer posture, hands joined | Often accompanied by hand-holding | No historical precedent for hand-holding |
| Sign of Peace | Reserved for clergy; often omitted | Extended handshakes and greetings | Breaks the silence before Communion |
| Atmosphere | Reverent, solemn, contemplative | Noisy, casual, emotionally expressive | Silence better prepares the soul for Communion |
| Expression of Charity | Faithful worship, prayer for others | Smiles, handshakes, and emotional displays | Charity is supernatural, not sentimental |
Summary:
Traditional Catholics do not hold hands during the Our Father or give the sign of peace—not out of coldness, but because of a deeper reverence for what the Holy Mass truly is: the Sacrifice of Christ on the Cross. These practices, so common in the Novus Ordo, are not part of the liturgical tradition of the Church. They are novelties introduced in the last fifty years, driven more by emotion and sentimentality than by sound doctrine or sacred custom.
The Mass is not a social gathering but an offering to Almighty God. Holding hands and exchanging peace are horizontal actions that turn attention away from God and toward fellow worshippers. Especially during the most sacred moments of the Mass—when hearts and minds should be fixed on Our Lord—these gestures are out of place.
True Christian charity does not require handshakes or hugs at Mass. Charity is found in truth and reverence, in praying for our neighbor's salvation, and in offering the Holy Sacrifice worthily. The traditional Latin Mass teaches the faithful to worship God in silence and awe, to receive Holy Communion with humility and recollection, and to avoid distractions that lead to a loss of focus and reverence.
Far from being uncharitable, the traditional practices preserve the sacred. And in doing so, they foster deeper love—both for God and for neighbor.
Further Reading:
The Catechism of the Council of Trent – section on the Eucharist
The Ottaviani Intervention – a critique of the Novus Ordo Mass
The Great Sacrilege – Fr. James Wathen (a sedevacantist in essence but not in name)
Mediator Dei (on the liturgy) – Pope Pius XII